Dating Soulmates

How can you tell the difference between just wanting to be their friend and whether or not you like them ( as in want to date the person)

And what is worse, being said no to as a friend, or being said no to as in for dating)

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my friend dated this guy 4 a year and in their relationship, there was nothing but sex. they never hanged out, like going to the movies or dinner. but he always went out in group-outings that included me. we grew to have strong feelings 4 each other. well…. i had feelings 4 him the start and he said he wanted to talk to me from the beginning, but he knew my friend since grade school and at that time she wanted him, too. he broke up with her 4 his reasons and asked me out. i accepted. i keep hearing about some unwritten rule about not dating your friend’s ex, but if they are not going out anymore then why can’t i go out with him. we don’t know if we were suppose to be soulmates from the start or something like that. i can see that it bothers her. and he told me some rude joke that she said, “everytime i kissed him, i’m kissing her vagina ” But in return, she acts like we are the best of friends.im going with him now and the relationship great, but she dislikes us being 2gether.

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We were never officially dating but I was obsessed with him for a couple years and we “hung out” etc. until we finally had a talk and broke it off (whatever ‘it’ was).

My best friend likes him too, always has. Tonight they’re going out on a “sort of” date. He’s doing to her what he did to me, probably, leading her on. I don’t think he is serious about her and although chasing him around was fun for me, it wasn’t very healthy.

Should I tell him to knock it off? Should I tell her not to see him? She knows what I went through with him but I think she is hoping he is serious about her.

I don’t begrudge her happiness but I have to be honest, it bothers me. She’s going to be used.

Please don’t tell me to dump her as a friend – we’ve been best friends and soulmates for almost 20 years. Should I talk to him, talk to her, or none of the above ’cause it’s none of my business?

Brutal honesty welcome but be nice…

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